A quick translation of my speech:

carp: depending on the context, it can mean "shit" or "crap" with the letters rearranged; when used in "I am the Keeper of the Sacred/Holy Carp!" it can be translated as "I am your Lady and Goddess, now worship me, bitch!"

*kicks something* : An expression of annoyance, usually directed at whatever the kick is being directed at. In the case of *kicks something* the annoyance is generalized and undirected; not to be confused with *kicks the world* in which case the subject really is annoyed with everything in particular, and not just everything in general.

Fork : as with carp, it is a modified version of "fuck", most often used to get away with profanity in school around the teachers that actually give a fork about things like that. Notable uses: in Latin, as "I hate this forking language" written on homework assignments.

spiffy/nifty: equally emphatic expressions of interest/happiness- on about the same level as "oh, that's cool", only not used as often.

Snifty: a combination of sweet/spiffy and nifty; generally more emphatic than spiffy or nifty alone.

Spiff: not to be confused with spiffy, this is the superlative form of the word.

I WEEP: an exclamation of anxiety or just plain angst, accompanied by dramatic swooning and pouting. Usually a response to constant poking or losing something.

You live in a box!: Can be translated as "You are so completely and totally out of it, like dude!" or "You are isolated from the world; even I know what they're talking about, and we all know how clueless I am." Generally a derrogatory statement. The aforementioned box is not a Klein bottle, despite the insistence of certain delusional characters. It is, in some cases, shiny and brown, and frequently only has one air hole, which must be sat upon. There may or may not be a twig.

I want to put that in a box!: NOT to be confused with "You live in a box!" the box in question here is a box of spiff and awww-inspiring things. This is a complement- if one is told by the subject that she wishes to place you in a box or something of yours in a a box, it is an indication that there is something about you the subject admires. Typically things that go into this box are "cute".

woo: A more ironic sounding version of "yay". It is the shortened form of "woo-hoo", which may also be heard; generally an exclamation of happiness.

Gad, I have too much free time. So, there it is, just in case some of you were wondering.