Yes! I did just write about tomatoes! Woohoo! I blame it on Bird by Bird:

"Next I talked to my slightly overweight alcoholic gay Catholic priest friend. I said, "Do you get jealous?"

He said, "When I see a man my own age in great shape, and I feel all conflicted, wishing I were that thin and yet at the same time wanting to lick him, is that jealously or is that appreciation?""

That line shouldn't amuse me so much, but it does. Does it ever. Good book. From now on I shall listen to my brocoli. Or, in my case, my tomato.