Warnings for frequent mentions of sex, ownership of a bong, and gratuitous...grilled cheese. Von and Ari'i skirt around their Issues.

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The kitchen filled with that strained, guilty air of people who have just had sex when they know they shouldn't have. Von scrambled noisily through the kitchen cabinets, looking for a lighter. The cigarette clamped firmly between his teeth bobbed slightly as he chewed on it. Ari'i rubbed at a hickey on her collar bone absently while watching the way his hair fluttered in every direction as he moved. The coffee maker hummed in the background.

She looked up when he slammed another drawer shut and muttered something uninteligible beneath his breath. She scowled. "You're not actually going to light that, you know."

He stared at her, still chewing on the cigarette. "Why the fuck not? We just screwed on my living room floor, Ari'i- with the kids barely a room away. I'm entitled to a cigarette." He opened another drawer and slammed it shut a moment later. "Should we separate them yet? Do you think they've got their clothes on?"

She rolled her eyes. "If you weren't so easily distracted, you'd know that both of them are fully clothed, and that Zyn is asleep. Cata is standing by the window, talking to Nocturne. Put the cancer stick away, Von. You're not smoking while I'm here."

He slammed another drawer with a flourish. "Did you look? Naughty, naughty, Ari'i- Cata doesn't like having her privacy invaded. What do you have against my cancer sticks, anyway?"

She pointedly ignored his first comment; even if she wanted to explain the constant emotional feedback she received through Imbrium, he wouldn't listen, or wouldn't understand. Ari'i couldn't figure out why he remembered so much of the past when he had such a bad relationship with Umbra. "It'll rot your lungs- and I'm elementally opposed to them, anyway." She leaned across the counter and pulled the slightly soggy cigarette out of Von's mouth. She tapped it against the countertop. "Earth and fire combine to create air. You'd get the same calming effect from insense, but I'd still object. Rather, Imbrium would, and I prefer to keep him in a good mood."

He pouted for a moment, then grinned. "I've got a water pipe in the closet. Would that please Imbrium?"

"A bong?" She snorted. "I'm not at all surprised. I always figured you were a stoner, or a crackhead. It's beyond me how you got through law school."

"I shagged my professors for good grades." His grin was pure evil, and Ari'i suspected it wasn't far from the truth. He ducked below the countertop, and his voice floated up above the clatter of pans. "But seriously, the bong was actually a graduation gift from my aunt. My father's side of the family is Lebanese."

"Which explains why you're blond, of course."

He dropped a cutting board on the counter with a thunk. "Come on, Ari'i. How well do you know me? I don't even remember my natural hair color."

"Really." She narrowed her eyes thoughtfully. "Your hair doesn't feel dyed..."

"You'd know, wouldn't you? Nearly pulled half of it out back there..." He rummaged in the fridge and came up with a tomato. "I'm hungry," he stated, "and I'm going to make something to eat."

Ari'i raised an eyebrow at the apparent non sequitur, then shrugged. Air-head. "You can't cook, Von. I've seen you go for days without solid food, unless you count butter and Miracle Whip."

"I can so cook. I can cook exactly five meals." He pulled a very sharp knife out of yet another drawer and began cutting the tomato with careful, vehement slices. "There's the 'let's get to know each other' dinner, which is a fairly simple afair; vodka penne with chicken, and a nice, expensive wine. Then I can make the 'we're going to fuck tonight' dinner, which is a huge pain in the ass, because it's basically seven courses of finger food, most of which require things to be cut up into really annoying shapes. I serve champagne with that one. The last course is chocolate covered strawberries, naturally. It's a useful cliche and they fall for it every time." He wrinkled his nose and grinned, gathering more items from various places around the kitchen.

A loaf of bread, a stick of butter, a tub of margarine, three different kinds of cheese, capers, and three glass bottles of unidentified green things appeared on the counter next to the neatly sliced tomato. He shaved thin slices of cheese into a heaping pile and continued. "My favorite is the 'morning-after breakfast'. I've got this waffle recipe that tastes amazing if you let the batter sit in the fridge for a few days. So I whip that up before I get started on the 'fucking tonight' dinner, and then I just have to get up early enough and voila! Instant breakfast in bed. They always find the fresh squeezed orange juice particularly impressive." He dropped a frying pan on the stove, and Ari'i wondered if he realized how careless he was with the things that belonged to him. For some reason, the thought disturbed her. "The easiest thing to make is the 'let's just be friends lunch'. I used to do a variation on the 'getting to know you dinner', but after someone tried to rip out my eyes with a fork, I switched to plain sandwiches. No cutlery necessary. Lemonade is optional, depending on how long we were sleeping together."

Ari'i shook her head, both disgusted and impressed. "You're such an evil little whore, Von."

"Funny, that's what most of them said." He lapsed into silence. Von buttered both sides of the bread while the skillet sizzled, and alternated layers of cheese and tomatoes with a liberal sprinkling of capers and what looked like dill between each layer.

"So, what's the fifth thing? That was only four."

"Grilled cheese. Would you like some?"

"No catchy name? Who gets grilled cheese?" She eyed the now identified culinary creation warily. No grilled cheese she'd ever encountered before looked like that.

"People I care about." The immense amount of grease involved in the sandwich probably kept it from getting soggy, Ari'i reflected. It did smell wonderful, though.

"But not people you sleep with," she observed.

Von focused on poking the cheesy mess with a spatula for a few moments before answering. "No, generally not."

She tilted her head to the side. "What am I, then?"

He barely hid his smirk. "My intern."

Ari'i stood up calmly and took five long strides to his side of the countertop. Her palm connected to his cheek with a crack that resounded throughout the apartment; completely unprepared for any violence on her part, Von nearly fell face first into the stove. She returned to her stool, not a hair out of place, as he worked his aching jaw soundlessly with involuntary tears in his eyes.

"I'm lactose intolerant, but thanks anyway."

"Oh. I'm sorry." It took him a few moments to find his voice again, and he wouldn't meet her eyes.

She knew he wasn't talking about the food; however, sorry wasn't good enough and they both knew it. "You're burning your grilled cheese, Von," she said gently. He looked alarmed, and then confused. It snapped him out of his guilty stupor, though, and that was important.

He poured a cup of coffee for both of them, and sat down with his sandwich. They stared at each other for a moment. Ari'i finally sighed and reached out to cup his chin. His face was red where she'd slapped him; there would probably be a bruise.

"You're impossible," she murmured.

He smiled and kissed the palm of her hand. "And you're a manipulative bitch."

"A match made in heaven?" she suggested archly.

"We'll both end up in hell."

"We'll be in good company, then."

"Indeed."

They drank their coffee in companionable silence, and watched the shadows grow longer through the kitchen window.

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I'm blaming this on Olive Garden. I mean, I know I've been itching for some sort of creative outlet, but...this was a bit much.

I love Von. He could give Dei lessons in angst. :)