pencil tool.

whoa

Much as the wacom is disgustingly nifty, it's deeply depressing to realize that I have no talent whatsoever. I rather wish I could get Painter Classic to work on Lulu, or at least work in such a way that it doesn't turn my screen horrible shades of purple and chartreuse. Not that it would make much difference, given that I suck.

I should not be browsing art sites when trying to draw. I think I'll go curl up in a ball in the corner now and lament. *lament! lament!*

Damn my lack of caffeine tolerance! Damn the Vanilla Coke that is now gone! Damn!

Damning aside, I am now the proud and happy owner of Star Ocean 2 and Final Fantasy Saga Frontier 2. Nope, never played the first one of either. I was hoping to find a copy of some form of Suikoden, but that's not likely to happen, ever. *sigh* Unfortunate, really- it seems like a fascinating series. Still. I now have Star Ocean, and I have wasted ridiculous amounts of time on it. (This is mostly the brother's fault, mind you. If he had just stayed away from that damn town for three more minutes, I wouldn't have had to start over from the beginning.) My main reason for playing the game was Ashton, of course. I mean, the guy gets possessed by a slapstick duo of dragons, and spends the rest of the game a) bemoaning his fate, b) kicking ass, c) acting cute and vaguely girly, and d) obsessing over barrels. That's it. That's enough. I'm done.

The translation is only about half a shade of awful- doesn't compare to Tactics or even parts of the English version of FFIV. Occasionally the dialogue feels a little too literal, or the characters will mix up their pronouns, or contractions will be few and far between...but it's comprehensible, and at times highly amusing. Doesn't compare to Lunar's localization, though, which is disappointing.The beginning is a little slow and stilted (especially Claude's scenario- my god, was that an hour of pure dialogue?) but it picks up after a little while. The battle system is fairly fun, once you master it (targeting is a minor bitch, and switching between characters can be annoying, but it isn't often necessary, so it balances) and the item creation thing- I think I've blown at least five hours total doing nothing but cook. How many games let you cook things, and make jewelry, and other fun and silly things like that? It's ridiculous.

I do love it dearly, though, even if I'm annoyed that I have to choose between characters...I don't get Opera or Ernest with Ashton, and I can't get Bowman if I get Precis- not that I want Precis, mind you, but Bowman is useless in battle, no matter how cool he may be outside of battle. Though I don't know that cool is the right word to describe Bowman...*snorkle* Yes, I sense many, many hours of my life sacrificed to this game. Many hours indeed.

"The gate is about half a day's flight away..."
"Would that be as the crow flies or as the dragon flies?"
*choking*
"The dragon has a brain hemmorage, falls over and dies, and crushes you all."
*d'oi* *three minutes later, after everyone has stopped choking...*
"Or maybe an unladen swallow..."
*sound of repeated beatings*
"...nevermind..."

D&D shennanigans, brought to you by ridiculously high levels and far too many dragons. (And trees. Can't forget the trees. Oh, the trees. Run in terror from the trees.)

Here's a question: How long does it take a friendship of countless years to dissolve completely? Answer: I'll get back to you on that one when they're no longer on speaking terms.

It's painful to watch, though. Very painful. I wonder if they even realize it's happening...

"I, myself, only know of perhaps 350 planes, and I am but a prince..."
"So, got a map?"
"...*he looks thoughtful for a moment* I do not have a map that would be a flat, paper thing..."
"Got a sphere?"
"*The dragon looks at you and starts casting a spell. It seems to be a silence spell.*"
"*Now you've done it. You've gone and gotten us killed, haven't you? Who taught the fighter Draconic?*"

"Yeah? Well it's not my fault the cleric is confused as to what his class is! He thinks he's a fighter, damnit!"

"Wait, what's a spell like ability?"
"I sneeze, only it's a horn of blasting."
"Damn man, what god did you piss off?"

Mngraaaarrrglephlggttpt.

...yes, that about covers it. G'night.

Blaauugh. For my first serious wacom attempt, Urban's picture isn't bad, I guess...but his mouth bugs the hell out of me. I rather like the way his eyes and shirt came out, even if his shoulders are a little bit too narrow. Urban's a sweet kid, really (not much of a kid, but still a little naive despite his feigned cynicism) and he's good with the children, for all that he pretends to dislike them.

Scenery sucks, but I can no longer in good faith leave blank space behind my floating heads anymore. *sigh*

...I should go to sleep and stop being a moron, shouldn't I? D'oi!

The young man moved swiftly but unhurriedly through the rows of beds- his step was purposeful, but unalarmed. It was simply the natural length of his stride that brought him so quickly to the screaming child. He was no older than seventeen, and the child in question no older than nine- both were probably much younger, though no one still alive knew for sure.

Hands scarred and callused from paper cuts and acid spills shook the boy awake. "Shh! Quiet, 'Neki. You'll wake the others." There was no point in keeping his voice low in the wake of 'Neki's screaming. Pairs of bright, sleepy eyes were already blinking open around them; he gave the nearest one a reassuring pat on the head and turned back to the shaking little boy.

"Aaaahhh!" Urban choked as several stones of terrified Hannamen child wrapped itself around his neck.

"Shhh." He gently stroked the fuscia and green spikes of Solneki's hair, noting that the normally perky antennae were drooping. The child took a huge gasping breath, and was quiet. "It was just a dream, 'Neki. Look around- it was just a dream." He helped 'Neki out of bed and held his hand. "Back to sleep, the lot of you. I'll come back in a few minutes, and if I see any eyes still open I'll tell Brother Vectal you were up past curfew." What few shining eyes had opened immediately snapped shut with tiny gasps of horror. Urban nodded to himself and led Solneki out of the bedroom. The monastery corridors were dimly lit with warm golden lamps; when they reached the library, Urban lifted the scrawny child on top of his desk and sat down in his chair.

Solneki watched him with wide, green eyes; the normally dark green markings on his face were pale and barely visible in the weak library light. "It wasn't just a dream, Urban."

"I know. Tell me." He was used to Solneki's dreams; the boy had been having them for years, but no one else had ever bothered to listen to him when he woke up screaming. Usually he would scream himself raw and fall back to sleep from sheer exhaustion. Urban told himself he only helped Solneki because he could get back to work sooner if he put the boy to bed. It was impossible to get anything done while the child screamed. But- and he tried not to admit it to himself most of the time- even if he did normally sleep at night, Urban still would've gotten up to listen to Solneki's nightmares. He often had to remind himself that he didn't like children to stop himself from considering Solneki to be his friend.

Solneki's legs dangled off the side of the desk- he knew better than to kick. If so much as a scratch appeared on the ancient and already somewhat battered desk, it would be replicated in the Hannamen's rather thin hide. "It was the black space again. Empty. It screamed and tried to swallow me."

"You've had that one before," Urban noted. "Anything different?"

"There was someone else there. He reminded me of you, a little, but I couldn't see his face. The black space tried to take him, too. I..."

"You...?" Urban prompted.

"I didn't want it to take him. He was important, and if I lost him, horrible things would happen. To me, to you- to everything."

"I was there?"

"No. But horrible things would have happened to you anyway. I could hear it singing- 'one down and the world to go' and it was laughing when it reached for me." There was a haunted look in those liquid green eyes. He slid off the desk and crawled into Urban's lap, burying his face in the folds of the librarian's robe. Urban supressed a sigh and began stroking the soft bright hair once again.

"Lap rat," he muttered, trying to sound irritated.

"Dusty book monster," Solneki returned, his voice muffled by dark orange cloth.

Urban snorted. "Plant-thing."

"Librarian."

This time his snort sounded more like a chukle. "Bug eyed little brat."

Solneki's only answer was a faint snore. Urban rolled his eyes and carried the sleeping boy back to the dormitory.
-------------

Aw, cute. This is Urban. Complete with library behind him. (Yes, those are books. Don't ask about the other stuff- I think the librarian doubles as apothecary or chemist or whatever- moonshiner, maybe.) My grandma thinks its a picture of a girl- I haven't the heart to tell her otherwise.

As for Solneki- sometimes he's an inscrutable blond who always wears sunglasses and a black three piece suit with the stupidest tie ever- it's got those stupid yellow smilies all over it and its the only colorful article of clothing he wears. (Even his underwear is black (boxers or briefs? Only Mordant knows- and then, only because of some rather odd circumstances involving a small dog, an incriminating casette tape, and a very large bottle of SoCo. Solneki still holds that it was all Mordant's fault.) but then again, that could just be a rumor.) When Solneki isn't some mysterious man with a stupid tie and lots of money, he's a Hannamen- some sort of plant/bug/human hybrid creature. He's the last of his kind, and a rather brilliant scientist, and absolutely nucking futs for the most part. Mordant doesn't know what to do with him half the time, even though he's supposed to be protecting him. (Mordant is more or less the same in both cases- grouchy, foul mouthed, and always getting dragged into Solneki's schemes. I think he's more of a subordinate in Solneki-with-a-tie's story, whereas Solneki-Hannamen is a little like some sort of random lost puppy he has to deal with.)

This one is, obviously, Solneki Hannamen, as a child, growing up in an orphanage run by a bunch of monks. Urban sort of appeared when I started thinking about making a character named D'mitri. (Anastasia was on TV last night. I still haven't seen it all the way through, but..."And then I kick her!") Dun know why someone named Urban would appear when I'm thinking about D'mitri, but hey, I've never presumed to understand how these things work. Urban amuses me, at any rate. Librarian.

Forgot to mention the movies I saw yesterday- "Mallrats", which was disgusting and hilarious and altogether far more amusing than it should have been, and "Dead Again" starring and directed by...Kenneth Brannaugh.

It was one of dad's netflicks DVDs, and he usually gets some weird shit from netflicks, which is why I headed towards Lulu when he pulled out the DVD. As soon as he mentioned that it had Kenneth Brannaugh in it, I came running back. It's from the late 80's or early 90's, back when he was really cute. Harry Potter just didn't do him justice- you've got to watch Hamlet or some of his other earlier movies to understand why I'm so obsessed with him.

"Dead Again" had him not only ten years ago when he was gorgeous (he still is, mind, he's just gotten a bit older- looked somewhat like Ewan McGregor back then, actually...only a rather better actor and that's saying a lot since Ewan is pretty good at what he does. Anyway.) but it had him with an alternating German and American accent (he sounds utterly obnoxious as an American- it was delightful) and with a goatee at times, short spiky hair at others, and a silly foofy haircut for the most part. It was great. The movie was something of a murder mystery- with all sorts of lovely things like hypnosis and reincarnation and...scissors thrown in. Oh, the scissors. *horror* The scissors!

*'hem* Twas good. 'Twas very good, and brilliantly directed. Y'know how a movie is supposed to have you on the edge of your seat gasping for air because you're just that engrossed in it? Oh yeah. Any and all scenes involving scissors managed that brilliantly. Watch the movie and you'll understand. "You know I would never hurt you, Margaret." *shudder*

Robin Williams was in it, as an ex-shrink working at a convenience store. And Emma Thompson was in it as...uh...well, that would be spoiling it, wouldn't it? Andy Garcia, also, as a newspaper reporter. A very cynical newspaper reporter. Oh, so cynical.

But, oh, it was good. Everything a gal could want- reincarnation and Robin Williams and black and white film and Andy Garcia and ancient jewelry and gender-bending and Kenneth Brannaugh and much hypnosis and, of course, scissors.

Such a good movie.
"Karmic credit: buy now, pay forever."

So, Happy Boxing Day to all you Canadians and wannabe Canadians out there...*wink*

And, hopefully all you Christmas celebrators out there got a nice haul- I've got a wacom tablet now, a small one, which is perfect, and it's a pretty red color and looks all spiff and shiny on the desk (In my excitement, I shoveled all the crap on the desk under the desk, and now the desk is almost clean...) which makes me endlessly happy. Made the Christmas and whatever card with it. I also finally did a sketchy "Highwayman" type of thing- my printer is incapable of printing things with any amount of detail, which makes me sad...I suppose I could always comandeer a printer at work and have it look all professional and shiz- It's amazing what you can do with a bare minimal knowledge of anatomy and a wacom tablet.

I also got many books, including Salt: A World History. That's what I get for reminding dad that I used to steal encyclopedias and read them late at night. I was ten or something. I didn't know any better. (Once, in sixth grade, I was accused of reading the encyclopedia for fun. Sensing that they were only teasing, I wisely kept silent. Now the guilty secret is out, oh no! *snorkle*)

(Side note. Vocabulary lesson: splee- verb- to spew glee. It's not as painful as it sounds. snorkle- noun/verb- a cross between a snort and a chuckle. More fun to write than either.)

I would have gotten a long sword, but there was a problem with shipping. So, no gift from the brother. The other brother got me a copy of "Heathers" ("a must see for the professional cynic"- wtf?) and a set of juggling balls. *D'oi* Also, everyone and their uncle gave me blank notebooks. No, for serious. And I'm not talking about five star whatnots- I think all my relatives raided the jounal/notebook section of Borders and paid by the pound- or ream. So. Many. Notebooks. *_*

I think they're trying to tell me something...*grin* Kevin received a Darth Vader lego set, and was up until three on Christmas morning (our presents are opened at half past midnight, you see- odd tradition, but we're impatient people and everyone is awake then, anyway). Naturally, by the next day I'd decided that the Jedi Sith Lord wasn't nearly festive enough- the red lightsaber was a good start, but not enough. So the Dark Sith Lord received a nicely festive red hat and cape, and some tinsel to brighten his helmet. Kev was not amused, but Darth Santa sat on the mantel until after dinner.

It was good. That's all. It was good.

And that about covers it, folks. Have a happy day. (I know I will.) :)

Am trying to find ways to avoid (pronouns) sleep right now. Could go and read...dun feel like it though. Shall blog random things, instead.

...*cricketchirp*
Have not finished Christ's Mass shopping yet. Went to church today, decided that the new priest is highly irritating. Decided also that celebrating Yule would be greatly preferrable to celebrating Christ's Mass. Sadly, Yule is now. Have missed celebration. Drat. Hopefully the sun will come up tomorrow (as opposed to a large ball of flaming gas illuminating the planet). Ought to stop reading Pratchett, but likelyhood of that is slim to none and none just kicked slim's ass.

Am feeling horribly uncreative and blocked. More likely to stare at a screen and drool than anything else. *frustrated* Want very badly to draw, to write, to create, to boldly split infinitives where none have been split before- but can not manage any of those things. *sad* Am almost reduced to making cheesy Christ's Mass cards out of cardstock and red construction paper. Have already made two- best to not make any more, lest it become a habit.

Am somewhat angry at certain people, namely those having to do with MUN. Am, actually, very angry at said people. Would like to drop out of ILMUNC, but there is much conflict, and said conflict is only adding to creative blockage. The fact that am sitting third chair in region band may also have something to do with said blockage. Parents have much to do with creative blockage as well. Will not explain when not using personal pronouns, though. School newspaper is creative blockage personified. *kicks Beacon* Fact that Suzycat is old and decrepit and dying is...depressing, which can't be helping creative blockage. Am thinking she has cancer of some sort. Happens to cats sometimes. Suckage.

...*sigh*

Have just finished reading Hogfather. Susan is growing on me. I didn't much like her in Soul Music, but I much prefer her as the poker weilding "inner babysitter".

And Death? Stop being so godsforsaken cute. 'Tisn't natural, it ain't. Same thing for Hex. FTB, indeed. *snort* Ridcully-ous. (Of all the wizards, I rather like Dean and the Bursar best. And the Librarian, of course, but that goes without saying.) My favorite Discworld character would be a tossup between Vimes and Death, I think...with Death of Rats, Susan, and Luggage coming in as runners up.

I now have two more Discworld books to read- Guards, Guards! and Small Gods. My Pratchett library is growing, slowly...soon, I shall take over the world! *coughcough* Whups, did I say that? I meant, soon, I shall have lots and lots of good things to read. *coughcough* Got a tickle in me throat or somesuch...

To all people who saw LoTR, and especially all the ones to whom I said "You suck. Hard."-

I apologize, though not profusely, and really only to gloat, because I have now seen it twice.

So there.
(Thoughts: Screw Aragorn (figuratively), I'll take Eomyr and Haldir- the prickly bitch elf. Gotta love the prickly bitch elf. He needs some lovin'. (Haldir, by the way, nearly made me cry- but he very much so made me squeal with joy when he showed up at Helm's Deep. Go Elves!)* Frodo, or Elija Wood, whomever comes first, needs to stop whining and must confess his undying love to Sam, as is right and proper. Even KE finally picked up on the subtext- but it really isn't subtext when they're smashing you over the head with it. "It's your Sam!" "Who's yo' Sam?" *cacklcackle* Ye gods, it was worse than the first movie- thankfully, no godsawful Titanic-esque flutes in the background- such cheesy treacle! And treacle really shouldn't be cheesy, that's just disgusting, really- but I guess it depends on the kind of cheese. Legolas- I'm smelling some subtext 'tween him and Aragorn that wasn't really there in the first one. (Except at the Elves' secret council thing in James' apartment complex. Because James is Elrond, and is keeping Gandalf in his closet. (Because Elrond is really a Chinese guy from Canada with an extensive library of anime. And he has Gandalf in his closet. (And because it's really a sort of "You've got to know him to understand" sort of thing, only not- it's really more of a "You've got to see the Wall of Bokken's and the rice cooker to understand" sort of thing, instead.)) I think I've been reading too much Terry Pratchett lately.) I mean, the whole thing with Arwen's necklace, and "You're late" and the glances! The deep, meaningful glances! They need to stop it with the deep, meaningful glances. Legolas had cooler fight sequences in the first movie. The first movie, however, did not have Ents. And Ents, as we all know, rock. With rocks. Did they ever rock with rocks. Part of the reason (aside from the headcounting at Helm's Deep and Grima Wormtongue and the Palantiri) The Two Towers was always my favorite of the trilogy was the Ents. They cut out some of the most amusing parts with the Ents! *sob* And there was no Gandalf monologue on the Battle of Moria. (Dun see why Gandalf couldn't just march on up to Mordor, bang on the gates and go "Yo, Sauron, open up, bitch! This be my turf now, yo!" and end it all. You know he could.) And there was no digging through the ruins of Isenguard and finding pipeweed, or Palantiri. *sob* Unless that happened in the third book, but I swear I wouldn't remember it then, having only read that one once. The Two Towers has been read countless times, and I liked the book better. The Ents sang in the book. And there was Quickbeam, in the book. THEY CUT OUT QUICKBEAM!!! *triplesob, with a sniffle* Eh, well. 'Twas still pretty coo', both times I saw it. Eowyn really didn't kick enough ass, and Viggo Mortensen's wooden acting bugged me. Gollum...creeeepy. *shudder* Not at all what I imagined Gollum to be like. (Just as Orlando Bloom doesn't quite do it for me as Legolas- as Orlando Bloom, of course, he's quite lovely- but as Legolas, he isn't entirely up to snuff. Jonathan Rhys-Davies is the absolute spiff Gimli, mind. And wotsisname is an equally spiff Sam- same with Merry and Pippin (can't tell em apart, mind) and Gandalf. But that's Ian McKellan for you. Wonderful at everything (he started off Shakespearian. What more do you want?). Viggo and Orlando and Elijah just don't quite cut it. Or rather, Elijah would, if he weren't so...ngaaahhrrrgghh. There's no other way to describe it other than: ngaaahhrrrgghh. The elves are otherwise superbly cast (Haldir!) as are the Riders of Rohan.) Lemme see, what else, what else...all of the dialogue between Legolas and Gimli at Helm's Deep that got cut out makes me very sad. The fact that I haven't read the book since seventh grade, yet still remember Leggy's promise to show Gimli Mirkwood and Fangorn forests, and Gimli's explanation about the Helm's Deep caves means that I really, really liked that part. I've got to read them again, I can't remember enough. Tis very sad that I can't remember enough. I have decided, though, that instead of Canada, I shall move to New Zealand. Yessss, my preciousss...New Zealandsss it isss...)

*Hearing Aragorn shout "Fire Arrows!" in Elvish gave me an inspirational thwapping. (Some people get bunnies, or fluff balls- I get smacks upside the head.) Something about a race of Elves whose name for themselves means "arrow" or "archer" or some similar suchlike. None of this peaceful, wise, ancient race crap. These guys are mean and angry and have a penchant for wiping out small countries. They're wise and ancient, of course- but there are many kinds of wisdom, and sometimes all the peaceful, Zen thinking in the world isn't anywhere near as useful as the concept of "Friendly fire isn't." Lady Galadriel would fall down in a faint if she ran into their Lady of the Wood. *hmwahaha*

*sigh* I really, really like Haldir. Prickly little ice queen. *sniffle* *sigh*

The reason Boffo would do so well as a Gap commercial is because they're all blonde and vaguely Swedish looking, except for the ones with lavender hair or tendencies towards turning into large scavenger birds. And, y'know, the ones with claws and nasty ichor dripping from random appendages.

Eventually, 'twill be updated. No promises are made, though. (I'd love to have it done by the end of January, mind- maybe the Christmas Spirit of Lazy Writers Past will come to me one night and smack me with a chain or something. ...on second thought, that's overly kinky. Guess I'll just have to find the motivation and time on my own. *oi*)

I am a little Russian grandmother in training. When I am as wide as I am short, and have adopted several grandchildren, you will understand. Until then, just take my word for it. *cracks spine* Whew, but it's a relief to have that out of the way.

On an unrelated note, I will destroy the guidance department. There will be destruction. And explosives. *grr* (You see, I've resigned myself to not getting in to college. It's just not happening, though it will be through no fault of my own.)

i do not have 2 hours to chill cookie dough. bitch. i have, at best, half an hour. i do not want to stay up until two in the morning because of this.

worse comes to worse, i use the fake cookie recipe. don't wanna do that, tho. not sure how it'll work.


....oingoboingo! have found child proof cookie recipe. Bwahaha! No chill!

....doubleplusgood! I have reasserted my mad cookie skilz by busting out a batch of the most bogus sugar cookies ever! awesome, man! No, really, see, all hte other cookies I've made this week were only so-so. These're kickass, and I don't even much like sugar cookies. *sigh* I am almost content.

But I am tired...and now I must figure out who's getting what. *yawn* Wanna go sleepasleep now...

*we apologize for the appalling lack of grammar and spelling and coherency. we are experiencing technical difficulties. please return later, and we will try to have the problem fixed.*

*_*

I'm wondering- if I don't go to school tomorrow, will there be a small riot? A very small one, nothing big- but still.

I wonder. (Cuz I sure as the All is great dun wan' go school 'morrow.)

Today...was not a good day.

And to make matters worse, I think I broke the house. ...don't ask. Just- don't ask.

Must find recipe...

For all people who have already seen LOTR: You suck. Hard.

And with that though, she decided it might be time to turn off the computer and go to bed. Whether or not she did remains to be seen...(It was eventually decided, though, that the likelihood of sleep in the near future was about as likely as that of her ceasing to speak about herself in third person.)